In light of some recent developments...I am finding myself with lots of time to think...ponder...and transform. We as human beings are often always in pursuit. The pursuit of happiness, a better job, a new partner, a better relationship with God. The pursuit is always and external movement to the hopes of some form of positive change. My question is why are our pursuits so external...why so often do we look outside ourselves for the positive change we need in our lives. When in effect we need to allow ourselves the opportunity to listen and pursue our own hearts. Even better, we need to let God pursue our own hearts. By this I do not mean that I need to let Jesus do all the work in this relationship, but at the center of all that is good in my life is my heart. God gave me a heart large enough to share, so full of compassion and gifts it is my biggest fault and the biggest gift I have to offer the world. But I have been in such a rush to share it with, give it to, hide it from, that I have been to busy to listen to it. In this gift i have recieved is where God will ultimately pursue me, love me, honor his promises to me, bless me, grace me, and ultimately challenge me.
But....here it is...the connection....inorder to allow God to be in Hot Pursuit of the love of his life...(me, or Us)....I need to be okay with that aloneness. The idea that in my silence and the whole of who I am...where no one else can be...there is where God will rest. There is where He will ultimately pursue me.
1 comment:
Very well said! We get so burned out by our avid pursuit of change because we fail to realize what actually prompts change. Life really is two catagories: things that can't be changed and things that can. We tend to largely overestimate the first category and feel stuck in situations that we feel we cannot remedy, but the only problem is that they can't be remedied EXTERNALLY in our efforts. So much change can happen in the silences. Robert Foster said "If we hope to move beyond the superficialities of our culture, including our religious culture, we must be willing to go down into the recreating silences, into the inner world of contemplation." And, I have to be honest; solitude and silence scares the ever loving shit out of me. Silence is the door to true interaction with God. I am terrified that all I will find in silence is silence.
And yet, where else, but inside ourselves can we meet so truely with the living God?
Its so funny that we feel that external change comes externally. Its like trying to make a car go by getting behind it and pushing instead of getting IN it and touching the gas. Kierkegaard said "Then in a certain sense it is nothing I shall do. Yes, certainly, in a certain sense it is nothing, become nothing before God, learn to keep silent; in this silence is the beginning, which is, FIRST to seek God's Kingdom,"
Solitude is purposeful, only if we choose to allow its purpose.
Your a bad ass rock of a woman Dee. Keep the thoughts comin'.
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